Rebekah turned 1 this past Monday. I spent the weeks leading up to her birthday amazed at what has happened over the past year. There were times that I couldn’t stop smiling because I am so proud of all that she has accomplished already, and there were times when I was ready to sit down and cry for hours on end because I feel like she’s not a baby anymore.
At some point over the past year our tiny baby turned into a pulls-herself-up-on-anything (and will try to climb it) daredevil of a little girl.
I was actually starting to feel a little crazy with the whole being sad that she’s turning 1, until Chris and I let Bekah shop for an “after party” outfit for her birthday. We met a woman whose little girl was turning 1 a few weeks before Bekah. She was standing in the middle of a store with big tears welled up in her eyes and she asked me if I was ever sad that my baby was turning 1 already.
I smiled and told her I was so happy to hear that someone else was torn between being happy and sad too. Now, we may be the only two people who feel that way, but it sure makes me feel better to know that at least someone, somewhere in the world was having the same problems with her daughter’s birthday that I was with mine.
There are times when I’m not sure if feelings we have about things are because of Bekah and all that she has gone through this past year, or if they’re totally normal, everyday parent kinds of things.
Either way, as the big day drew closer, my sadness slowly gave way to elation over the fact that Bekah is doing so incredibly well. By the time she sat in her highchair skeptically eyeing an ice cream cone cupcake – like she wasn’t sure if she should eat it or play with it – I was ready for her to keep growing up…for now.